THE HOUSE I LIVE IN

my desk is crammed with extinct languages
without living descendants in sight
my ceiling heavy with gruesome attacks by serial killers
survived against all odds
my garbage can is a handful of banalities
my plate full of wars fought in vain
my fridge fraught with tears torn on the barbed wire
carefully stored and deep frozen for future use

my lamp shows me life in the spotlight
though it hates being left alone with my thoughts of tomorrow
swallowed by the sun
my coffee cup gives me a sardonic smile every time I tell it
I want him to love me in person, not in the abstract
my doors scream false pride and irregular accomplishments
my baggage begs me to reconsider
my mouse my only ally, deleting geography

my floor is a liquid mixture of
visceral bleeding and spilled brains
my mirrors aching mourners at the funeral
(blessed are not those who mourn)
the insistent audience demanding
encore after encore
after…
(sorry to disappoint you. I didn’t stay to the end of the movie)

my state of being is
a series of running and passing plays
my state of mind elsewhere
my head, a concert with fireworks timed
to the music of untuned percussion instruments
an extended clattering of pans and cutlery in the kitchen
my happiness beyond compare –
the medieval conception of justice


 

via THE HOUSE I LIVE IN ~ BOJANA STOJCIC — MORALITY PARK

Author: Blogging_with_Bojana

I'm diggin' Need to grow, have to push Flicking through vinyl and feeding the rush I dig for that one and I open the haunt It's takin' all day from the back to the front I'm diggin' and diggin' You know Sorry baby I'm gone diggin' www.bloggingwithbojana.com

57 thoughts on “THE HOUSE I LIVE IN”

  1. Irresistible beginning, and many lines I liked in this one.
    My baggage begs me to reconsider / my garbage can is a handful of banalities / encore after encore after… (sorry to disappoint you. I didn’t stay to the end of the movie). The ending was perfect too. The fireworks in your head are very impressive.

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I agree with Basilike..there is so much of this that is amazing. Every line a perfect, poetic paintbrush that is like eating Thai food for the first time: the flavor changes the more one eats.

    This is just perfectly wonderful.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I remember eating Thai for the first time. I fucking loved it. It was an explosion of flavors in my mouth…so this is an amazing compliment. Thank you.

      Remember what I told you after reading your poem In my head?
      https://brandewijnwords.com/2018/07/14/in-my-head/
      I said I was working on sth similar, yet different, and was, as you can see, in a pretty gloomy mood. (You know how much I love gloomy.) Soooo, this is the outcome. I was obviously stressed out and anxious, hence this ‘suicidal’ poem, as I call it, though you know I’m not the kind. That’s why I had to end it in a slightly jocular manner.
      I’m feeling good again, so back to new (or old) me. Wait and see.

      Thank you so much.

      Liked by 3 people

      1. While I had forgotten, I do now recall you saying that you had something similar but different.

        Yes, yes…you are a gloom lover. Thankfully you are also someone who won’t go there. Very happy to see you ended it the way you did.

        We love the new old you.

        Liked by 3 people

  3. Beautifully expressed, so poignant. I especially like the first stanza. Each verse is very powerful. I like the reference to extinct languages being myself a speaker of a minorised language, Catalan, even though some people just keep on denying the obvious facts. I like this:
    “my plate full of wars fought in vain
    my fridge fraught with tears torn on the barbed wire
    carefully stored and deep frozen for future use”

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I suck at golf too. I can’t juggle either. Life is either a corpse or a carnival for me. Neither are my idea of fun 🙂
        But, I’ll keep trying to find my groove, I’m pig headed like that.

        Like

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